I Watches it for You - 001

The Strangers.

The Strangers is one of those movies the looks like it is gonna be way good, like way good - but then is actually a big pile of shit.

But unlike most of those movies - you don't know that it is a big pile of shit until about halfway through it. Like a girl that is really hot, but then you find out she went to public school.

At first you're like - oh man, that's the other girl from that one aerosmith video - and you get worried. But then no shitty aerosmith starts playing - and you feel better.

Okay so the aerosmith video girl and some white guy go to a house in the middle of the woods somewhere. At four in the morning some girl knocks on their door and is all "listen to my christina ricci impression - oooh, i'm spooooky and junk."

White dude is like, "scram kid."
Aerosmith video girl is all "i'ma scaaaared."

And then the white guy leaves the aerosmith video girl in the house alone so he can buy cigarettes for her? What? It's like dude, really? That girl was JUST there, and she even told you she was spooky and junk. He was probably just trying to go get high without his stupid girlfriend jumping on his case. I mean, I'm a fucking adult - he might say.

Which is understandable, but it gets them all killed. Because while he is in a volvo listening to The Doors, the weirdo girl shows up with her friends - only now they are wearing K-Mart Batman villian Halloween Costumes.

And here is what you think for the next hour of the movie:
JUST FUCKING KILL THEM ALREADY!!!! GOD!!!!

And then they do.
And then it's over.

But if you stay past the credits you get to see Nick Fury.

Who is apparently a black 40's german fighter plane pirate - in a new-wave band.